Sunday, January 12, 2014

Day Twelve

"What is the best advice you've ever been given?"

        Don't get married.
        Well, don't get married before you're 28.
        Now, everyone is different.  Every relationship is different.  I know a few couples who did get married before they we're 20 and they're still happily married with 2 1/2 kids and a dog and the whole package.  However, I know more people who ended up divorced before they hit the two year mark.  The odds are not in your favor.
        The divorce rate for young couples is more than twice the national average.
        Not getting married when I was 22 was the best decision I ever made.  I wasn't ready.  I'm not saying you shouldn't get married because if it's right for you, then it's right for you.  The only thing I ask is that you make sure you're doing it for the right reasons.  Not because you're knocked up or because you feel obligated.  But because you really love that person and you want to spend the rest of your life with them, because that's what a marriage is supposed to be.  Too many people who get married only focus on one thing; the wedding.  And while the wedding is special and is a day you will remember, it's not the most important part of your marriage.  It's only one day out of the next 50, 60, 70 years.  In order for a marriage to work, you have to remember that.
        I don't like being the center of attention so getting married still terrifies me.  Matt has been married before and I have not, and he's told me that he wants to "do it right this time."  But I have to be honest, I'd rather go down to the court house and do it in front of the Justice of the Peace with only a few people there.  I don't want to walk down the aisle and have all these people staring at me.  The sheer thought of it scares me.
        Here's a good list of things to do instead, if you're thinking of getting engaged or married in your early twenties.  Just think about it.

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